Things You Can and Can’t Control: Empowering Strategies

things you can and can't control

I know some people out there are absolute control freak. They want to control everything, down to the tiniest details. But here’s the thing: those people waste a lot of time. There are just certain things you can and can’t control.

There are fewer factors under your control than outside of your control. That’s not what some people want to hear, but it’s true.

We have to accept that letting go can be beautiful and freeing. It frees your mind up to concentrate on things you can control and bring you happiness.

Again, it can be difficult to distinguish between what we can and can’t control. 

However, we can find a path to a more fulfilling life by acknowledging our limitations and focusing on what we can manage.

Key Takeaways:

We cannot control things like other people’s actions, the weather, and natural disasters.

Accepting the limitations of what we can’t control is important for our mental and emotional well-being.

We can control our actions, reactions, mindsets, and how we treat others.

Letting go of control can be hard, but strategies like practicing mindfulness and accepting uncertainty can help.

By focusing on what we can control and accepting what we can’t, we can find peace and fulfillment in navigating life’s unpredictable situations.

How can focusing on what we can control positively impact our mental health?

Focusing on what you can control can reduce feelings of helplessness and increase a sense of empowerment and agency. This shift can lower stress levels, improve problem-solving skills, and enhance overall mental well-being by directing energy toward actionable steps and letting go of things beyond control.

Things You Can and Can’t Control

Certain aspects of life are simply beyond our control. So much of life boils down to the things you can and can’t control, and addressing your mindset is key. Be accepting of what you can’t control and reframe the past to find the good in what happened. No matter how much we may wish to influence them, there are forces at play that are completely beyond us.

Therefore, why worry about managing uncontrollable circumstances? It is important to recognize that you can set boundaries when it comes to other people’s actions that may be hurtful to your physical, emotional, or mental health.

By setting boundaries and utilizing cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and other types of therapy, you can address and effectively manage cognitive distortions and maintain your own well-being, even in the face of things that are out of your control.

One of the most prominent examples of this is other people. We can’t control their thoughts, behavior, feelings, actions, beliefs, or reactions. 

Everyone has their own free will and independence, so we can’t be held accountable for their decisions or actions.

Mother Nature also falls into the category of non-controllable aspects. 

The weather, natural disasters, and other events are all factors that are simply beyond our control. We can’t dictate when the sun will shine or a storm will hit.

Time is another aspect that we cannot control. Time will continue, and we cannot slow it down or speed it up. It moves forward regardless of our desires or efforts to control it.  

I can’t control what somebody posts on social media. I can control whether I look at it.

I can’t control war, political views, or the economy. I can only decide how I will respond. Accepting what you can’t control is so empowering. Once you do that, you will have a burden lifted off your shoulders. I did.

Instead, focus on factors under your control. This will give you peace of mind.

Things You Can Control

While there are many things outside our control, we can still take charge of many things. By having influence over certain aspects, we can actively shape our personal growth and make positive changes. 

One of the key aspects we have control in life is over is how we react to different events. 

Our actions and reactions are entirely in our hands, allowing us to choose compassion, kindness, and understanding. 

Or the opposites, if you wish. But being negative, rude, and judgemental will take its toll on our mental health eventually.

Managing our reactions can create healthier relationships and a more positive environment.

Self-care is another area where we have control. By prioritizing our physical, mental, and emotional well-being, we can ensure that we are putting ourselves where we belong.

Taking care of ourselves allows us to show up as our best selves in various aspects of our lives, such as work, relationships, and personal pursuits. 

It involves setting boundaries, saying no when necessary, and creating space for rest and relaxation. Learn what is healthy for you to cope with what is happening.

Also, focusing on the present actions instead of getting caught up in the past or worrying about the future can significantly enhance our sense of control. 

By being mindful and fully engaged in the current moment, we can direct our energy towards what truly matters. 

This helps us make intentional choices, stay grounded, and maximize the opportunities that come our way.

It’s important to remind ourselves that we can’t always control what happens outside of us, but we can recognize how we react and what we do on the inside. And yes, we will also be dealing with the unpredictable. I can prepare, but I can’t control.

By consciously shifting our mindset to one of empowerment and growth, we can navigate challenges with strength and positiveness.

How to Let Go of Control

Controlling things in life can be a challenge, but there are strategies that can help us navigate this process. 

One approach to determining what you can and can’t change is to create a list of the things that bother you. 

Can’t Control- Can Control

Separate those items into two categories: Can and Can’t

This gives us visual clarity and allows us to prioritize where to focus our energy. 

By acknowledging our limitations and accepting what we cannot control, we can redirect our efforts toward managing what is within our influence.

An important step in letting go of control is embracing uncertainty. Life is unpredictable, and instead of trying to control every outcome, we can learn to adapt and go with the flow. 

We can find freedom and peace of mind by embracing change and being open to new possibilities.

Managing anxiety is another essential aspect of releasing control. Try meditation to handle the frustration that you are feeling.

Becoming mindful enables us to stay present in the moment without getting caught up in concerns about the future or regrets about the past. 

By practicing acceptance, we can learn to let go of the need to constantly be in control, reducing our anxiety and finding a sense of calm.

Alongside mindfulness, incorporating deep breathing exercises into our daily routines can help regulate our nervous system and alleviate anxiety. 

Taking the time to slow down and focus on our breath can bring us back to the present moment and help us let go of unnecessary control.

Journaling is another powerful tool that can assist in managing anxiety and gaining perspective. 

By writing down our thoughts, fears, and fears, we can explore them objectively and find alternative ways of looking at challenging situations. 

Journaling allows us to externalize our thoughts and emotions, providing us with a fresh outlook and reducing the need for excessive control.

When needed, seek support from mental health professionals. They can offer guidance, tools, and techniques tailored to our specific needs, helping us to let go of control and find peace of mind.


Understanding control is essential for our empowerment and peace in life. While many things are beyond our control, we must also remember that we can manage and influence numerous aspects within our reach. 

By accepting the uncontrollable and focusing on what we can manage, we can navigate life’s unpredictable nature with more ease and fulfillment.

Embracing uncertainty is a key component of finding peace. It allows us to let go of the anxiety and stress that come from trying to control every outcome. By practicing mindfulness and cultivating a mindset of acceptance, we can find a greater sense of calm and serenity.

Additionally, personal growth is an important part of managing what we can control. 

Through self-reflection and setting boundaries, we can prioritize our well-being and ensure our actions align with our values. 

Working towards personal growth also allows us to adapt to new situations and make positive changes in a world that is inherently uncertain.

While letting go of control is a process that requires patience and practice, it is worth the effort. We can find a profound sense of peace and joy in our lives by taking small steps and seeking support when needed. 

So, embrace the uncertainty, manage what we can, and accept the beauty of the uncontrollable. In doing so, we open ourselves up to a more fulfilling and meaningful existence.

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